But they did.
I forgot to renew my license registration for my wittle car, and James got pulled over, twice, while borrowing today to go to work. AND he couldn't even make it in to work, because they threatened to tow the car. Oh, and my car insurance lapsed. And if you're wondering why I am so "irresponsible", let me remind you that the bank just screwed me over for $600+, and I was busy paying to keep my house and car.
However, with this small exception, life is very good. Our Ohana thanksgiving dinner Saturday was AWESOME! We made turkey, ham, stuffing, pies, rolls, taters.... MMMMMMMmmmmmmmm it was yummy. I wrestled around on the floor with Jakey, and then "spooned" with James (clothed. We were clothed. No nasty ideas there.) when I was tired.
Had two emotional breakdowns over the weekend, last nights was especially exceptional. I blogged at my spiritual-stuff blog about spiritual abuse, but I've never really talked much about it... I mean, who would understand if I did? Half of the people would use it as ammo to say that Christianity sucks, and the other half would say I was evil and just had a skewed perspective.
Last night, as James & I were talking about which church to go to after marriage, I cracked. I sobbed uncontrolably in his arms... and it was good. I talked about it a little after my sob was done... and I feel cleansed.
But now, I must go... more updates later!
8 comments:
so pleased James was there and you were able to share your pain with him
sorry about the car mess - but that can be easily fixed and solved.
Thrilled you had a great Ohana Thanksgiving...it is wonderful to spend it with those you care about and surrounded by friendship and love!
As far as being spiritual or searching for that - I find that spirituality is extremely person and is very open to interpretation...when you find a church that works for you, a church that you just know feels like home - it will feel right.I hope your week is beautiful!
Peace--Ellie
Oh what a disaster! I can't believe all that you're going through Jana, the stress must be ridiculous. I'm so sorry and the fact that you're struggling with your beliefs makes it all the more challenging and you feel more alone. I'm so sorry, hugs to you!
Having experienced spiritual abuse and struggling to recover and reconnect with God, I can totally emphatize.
Journaling is a good way to begin to articulate your story. My journal turned into a book! I Can't Hear God Anymore: Life in a Dallas Cult
Peace,
Wendy J. Duncan
http://www.dallascult.com
Hang in - brackdowns are almost always breakthroughs to wherever it's time to go next. And it's so good you have someone to walk through it with! (or several someones).
hang in there Jana - things always get better!!
Ok, that just totally sucks about your car. Hopefully you can get it taken care of soon! Don't want to see Jana's wittle car towed to wittle impound to pay big fee.
Your Ohana thanksgiving sounds fun and rather tasty. YUM!
I'm glad you and James are talking about important issues. How are the plans progressing? Just concerned your spending to much time taking care of everyone else and not doing things for your wedding. This time it really is about YOU!!! It's ok for it to be!! Love ya!
eep!! thanks for the reminder ~ my registration is due this month too and i have a outstanding parking ticket that has to be taken care of first, sigh ...
hugs honey
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