Shelley decided to give me a precious gift... her Collage for Self-Discovery e-class!!!! It's six weeks long, and she checks in with each person once a week as they take the course. I feel like my life is so ready for this... I began to read lesson one yesterday, and couldn't even make it through the lesson before I just HAD to start making a binder for all of my collages I'll be making as I take the course, and of course while I was at it I made my first collage. Since all efforts to find a three-hole-punch have been unsuccessful thus far, my collages will be done on plain lined paper, with my written journalling about the collage on the back side. I plan to do a collage each evening during the course... I'm so excited!!!!!!! (I would, of course, be more excited if any of you wanted to join the e-class too so we could discuss it... :o)
The collage I made yesterday night shows the deep longing in my life... the longing of a little girl for an older sister to look up to, to help her fight battles and to be in her corner when things get rough... to teach her the ways of fashion and beauty.... and the longing for a strong mother figure. I believe the black-and-white of the mother figure shows that this need in my life is beginning to fade, as healing continues in the relationship with my mom, and as other women share with me their journeys through blogging. At the time I made the collage, I wanted to sit and cry as I looked into the little girl's eyes... now I feel oddly detatched.
In the spiritual goals file, my church is fasting this month, and my friend Kim decided that she and I were fasting pop. Water flavorings and teas have been bought in preparation for 30 days without yummy fizzy goodness. In the past two weeks, I've really been trying to get my spiritual life together, after about a year of barely praying, being angry with God, and even abandoning "my kids". This month, I'm committing myself to spiritual renewal... to praying every day and seeking God, and trying to live a life that reflects my faith.
For this month, you'll probably be hearing a lot about these two goals... goals that to be quite honest, scare me deeply. Both involve looking deep inside me... seeing who I am and what's happening in my heart and soul. To be quite honest, it's a lot easier to skip over this... to live life never knowing my true self, never letting light go into the dark corners inside of me.
The bottom part of my collage shows flowers blooming and growing, and beginning to spread outside of their comfort zone... perhaps so am I.
5 comments:
to replace soda: Celestial Seasons Vanilla Hazelnut tea. Oh! yum! YUMYUMYUM!!!!!
I came over to discuss politics, but I see you are being spiritual so I won't. =] Politics is enough to make anybody a tad nutty these days. Esp. me. And I'd hate to take you off your path.
So have some Vanilla Hazelut tea and go collage! (I did so good tonight - I uploaded dozens of photos with descriptions and all the myriad other details required to my WholesaleCrafts.com account. I have put that off FOREVER!)
Jana you are a natural at this. I look forward to seeing what will unfold for you on your collage journey.
Love to you!
Way to go on setting some goals for this month, especially the spiritual one! I am glad to see you bringing that back into perspective. It's easy to put God on a shelf when we are angry or busy or "________" I have felt disconnected too after a long season of alot of stress and it's still not over.
I am glad that you have a craft that you can use to reflect your feelings. I'd join you but I just don't have the time and I have never been able to collage anything that reflected personal feelings, not that I have tried that either. But I have made collages as craft projects and they were lots of fun.
Good job and keep at it!!!! I'm proud of you!
It really sounds like you're going through a spiritual renewal process, how beautiful Jana. And that collage! So deep and interesting, the feminine influences so strong and stunning.
I like how you are always blooming, Jana. Some part of your soul is always growing and progressing. :-)
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