When I heard about "gay," it was often in the story of Sodom & Gomorrah, towns so lustful that the men wanted to gang-rape an angel! When I didn't hear it in that sense, it was in news from outraged citizens, who had heard of gay parades where men groped each other and participated in other lewd behavior, of child molesters preying on young boys, or of straight men and women who were sexually harassed by a lustful gay colleague at their job.
This, to my young mind, was the face of "gay." And to be honest, this is the face of "gay" that many opponents of gay marriage still see. This is the face they want to protect their children from, and the face that inspires their hatred. And really, who can blame them? If I believed that all gay men would rape my sons, and all gay women would grope each other on my front sidewalk in front of my babies, I would be experiencing some serious hate too! lol
But the face of "gay" is not this grotesque image, any more than the face of Christianity is the bombers of abortion clinics. They are the radicals, the people who make the news... but they are not the norm.
The true face of "gay," I believe, is much more diverse. It includes people just going about their daily lives and enjoying their families, just like everyone else. It includes people throwing birthday parties for their kids, experiencing the nightmarish hell of home renovations (Oh, do I remember those days...) , and taking the required pregnant belly photos! It includes men and women, old and young, rich and poor.
*~*~*Today's Discussion*~*~*
How were gay couples thought of when you were growing up? How are they thought of where you live today?
6 comments:
hey Jana, I'm liking your posts so far. When I was growing up in the 70's being gay was a closed subject, it wasn't discussed, it was swept under the rug and kept behind closed doors. No one wanted to know about it. Sadly my uncle ended his life because he was gay in 1977. I miss him alot still - he was a lovely person. My feelings are that I don't have anything against the people that are gay, it's the lifestyle I don't agree with but then again I have to look at myself first before judging others. Just my two cents :-)
I feel old, but the word "gay" actually meant happy when I was growing up.
It wasn't until I was in high school that I saw the first "gay" person, as for a couple, nope.
You have to remember, I grew up in the 80's and at that time, I think homosexuals were barely coming out of the closet? Beats me.
Sorry I couldn't be more insightful.
I feel old, but the word "gay" actually meant happy when I was growing up.
It wasn't until I was in high school that I saw the first "gay" person, as for a couple, nope.
You have to remember, I grew up in the 80's and at that time, I think homosexuals were barely coming out of the closet? Beats me.
Sorry I couldn't be more insightful.
when I was growing up, in the bible belt in southeast ks, gay was NOT a good thing. at all. still isn't. i knew of a gay hairdresser, and the theatre prop lady. people were nice to them, but talked all kinds of shit behind their back. Times are changing and I know of one couple in my po dunk town that have a child together and are tolerated. but I know that child will experience hate and it breaks my heart. Things may be moving in the right direction but there is still so much work to be done. Thanks for pointing out that we have normal lives just like everyone else. Funny that you chose my daughter's birthday to link....that was a scary day for me. We only invited one child from school, and her mother was there. I was so afraid of her reaction to maggie having two moms that I made myself sick. She could have cared less. We still battle everyday to be accepted, some in our heads, some in reality. But it is certainly getting better.
hugs to you,
rae
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www.brokeneggs.wordpress.com
I grew up in a small town in Colorado. For whatever reason, I had several friends who were gay. I knew they were from a pretty early age even if I didn't really know what it meant!
In high school, I had several friends who came out publicly (or semi-publicly at least.) There is one photo in my senior yearbook where there are six people (I am one of them) and three of the six are gay! My close friend Travis was gay and I knew it and it never mattered to me. (He died in 1996 from cystic fibrosis.)
The thing for me was this - I was this kid from a small town who was very tolerant of different lifestyles, choices, ways of doing things, what have you... I was raised in a very strict, Christian home, where this was not a good attitude to have! Once out on my own, I realized quickly that I had very different opinions and beliefs than the ones I was raised with.
I still have friends who are gay. I support them fully. To me - it is not a choice that they have necessarily made, but how they were born. I know a lot of people don't agree with that, but that is definitely my opinion. Travis was the way he was from VERY early on! (Like kindergarten when I think about it!) He was a good person - no matter who he fell in love with. He was my best friend for many years, and I miss him very much. If he was still alive, I know I would have celebrated all kinds of milestones with him - and hopefully a loving marriage for him and a partner.
My opinions about gay marriage and the laws come from having so many close friends who it will and does affect! It is a personal face for me. Not my own experience, I am not gay, but my friends. I stand up for them!
Amy, valid point... I know in the eighties when I was growing up, everyone used gay as an insult, but we never KNEW anyone who really was gay. (Until the vet, and I only knew of her because we raised beagles to hunt rabbits with.)
Leti, that WAS insightful. :o) I didn't realize what a difference just ten years could make in the culture... I think there's less than ten years between us, actually.
Rae, welcome to my blog! It's definately not fair that the child should have to deal with so much hate... and it's not fair that you should have to worry about how hate will affect your child's life, AT HER BIRTHDAY PARTY. You should be worrying about the day, the decorations, and keeping the children from killing each other with sporks!
And BTW, on a side note, I am completely convinced that small towns are evil. Like, Children of the Corn... EVIL.
Tammy, although I'm a few years younger than you I think, our little school was behind the times. Well, school #1 in the land of corn (literally, it was surrounded by cornfields and a railroad track that occasionally was used to transport nerve gas. FUN!) had absolutely NO gay population at all. School #2 had one bisexual girl, 3 by the time I graduated. None were in my circle of friends, although two from my circle came out later.
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