I have really been depressed lately. I noticed it dramatically since James's shift has changed... but really, I was fighting it even before that. The week before we got the news, I did pretty much nothing. I came home every night, ate comfort foods, did minimal housework/cooking, and went to bed.
I don't know if it's a result of me being unmedicated, or what the deal is... but it's really grating on my nerves. I don't want to do anything, or go anywhere. I randomly cry for no reason. I am making horrible food choices. I couldn't even find the motivation to crochet or quilt!
So if you're wondering why I haven't blogged... it's cause I'm bummin'
7 comments:
Oh Jana, I wish I could be there to give you a big hug, however, since I cannot, here is a virtual (((HUG))), kiddo.
I don't really have any advice, only that I love you and will be praying for you and James.
hugs!
sweetheart its not what you want to hear but is is worth living like this
darling i speak from experience
see your doctor and get back on your happy pills
for some of us the chemical in our brain just doesnt work very well
it needs help
Im on one that suits me
if the last dont try something else
baby be kind to yourself
its not fun living with depression
Im urging you to go back on them because i care and love you and know dropping for no reason is fun
Ive been there
love you loads
Jen HUGS
I am so sorry to hear you're having such a rough time of it Jana. It must be much harder with him not there. When the spirit is depressed, it's hard to create. It's hard to do anything more than the basics. Sit with survival for now and just hold on. Hugs to you.
If you don't opt for prescription anti-depressants, let me recommend coffee, St. John's wort, and ginseng, which are all cheap mild safe anti-depressants (and they work in different ways and don't interfere with each other. Ginseng is an adaptogen, St. John's wort seems to be a mild SSRI, it may interfere with some other drugs though including birth control pills). I've always had more luck with ginseng gums than with straight extract, and you can get them at the Asian market downtown. Ah, I'm having a ginsing gum right now!
or....you could just chalk it up to body rhythms and cycles - we are not meant to be always chirpy. Have you calendared your depression cycles yet? It took me years to realize that the full moon either sets me off crazy or puts me in a corner (same moon - totally opposite reactions). More years to watch summer and winter solstice set off vertigo. February - always a long dreary month during which I'm very depressed (except this year and I paid for it with March and April being depressed - apparently I need that. it makes me slow down. It makes me pay attention to right now. It makes me reach out to friends and socialize (otherwise I'd always stay in the house, perfectly happy with myself, which I'm not when I'm depressed). It makes me stumble around and try new things. And then it goes away. And I didn't have to do anything. And I have to admit I am very against anti-depressents - I think they are waaay over perscribed.
Jana good for you to work your way out of the antidepressants...counseling would be a helpful place to help release some of those stored feelings perhaps...I am cheering you on!
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