I feel vulnerable, like the world under me is shifting and I am tossing my body from side to side, struggling to stay upright. The emotions that I have repressed for more than a year are making themselves known, and I feel overwhelmed by the feelings I am trying to embrace instead of run from.
Even in the midst of the storm, the dark clouds and then gusts of wind threatening to knock me off my feet - I know that I can't go back to hiding from my life. I will face it for as long as I can, giving myself permission to hide only when I just can't face any more, and then emerging from the hiding place as soon as I can.
One day, I will not need to hide - and that makes days like today worth writing about. One day I will read this, and remember the low moments on my journey, and be proud of how far I've come.
Even in the midst of the storm, the dark clouds and then gusts of wind threatening to knock me off my feet - I know that I can't go back to hiding from my life. I will face it for as long as I can, giving myself permission to hide only when I just can't face any more, and then emerging from the hiding place as soon as I can.
One day, I will not need to hide - and that makes days like today worth writing about. One day I will read this, and remember the low moments on my journey, and be proud of how far I've come.
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